Thursday, April 29, 2010

The Icehouse

This is a transcript of an original ad from decades ago (I don't remember the year, might have been around the 60s or 70s). It's a radio advert for The Icehouse, a skating complex. A friend gave the audio to me and what it is, is an unedited version (as you will read, it has swears and all that). ..

I just want to point out, that I did the transcript. A 3 minute audio took about 5 due to making the attempt to get it right.

for the facebook community "Sometimes I swear... so fucking what?"

The Icehouse is now open to the public! And what will we do at the Icehouse? We're not going there to get ice! We're going to the Icehouse for FUN ! And lots of fun. The Icehouse is located in the Farmer's Market Building in Town and Country Village with 22,000 square feet of ice for private parties, public skating, ice skating lessons for all ages. The Icehouse features facilities for amateur ice hockey games, and the Houston Arrows as well as other WHA teams will practice there. It's an icehouse full of icy fun! Remember, the Icehouse, yes. |cough| Big and beautiful baby. Big and beautiful. Alright now here we go. We're gonna take this spot and we're gonna do it right. We're not gonna fuck it up anymore. God damn mother fuckin son of a bitch! We're gonna do this mother fucking, cock sucker right! You better fucking well believe it baby! Are you ready you cocksucker - here we go, you mother fucking sorry son of a bitch, low life dick sucking bitch! The Icehouse is now open to the public, and what will we do at the Icehouse? We're not going to the... yea. We're gonna go there and SHIT! That's what we're gonna do. We're gonna go and we’re gonna fuck everybody's wife. Except our own, which would be a god damn fucking disgrace! Wish I had a god damned spike nail, I'd...chew that mother fucker up. Spit it out my asshole... Fucking Icehouse. Who ever thought of opening up a cocksucking Icehouse? The Galleria’s one fucking thing, but this shit - is something else. Mother fucking... shit. Piss. Hell. God Damn... We gotta do these fucking spots for em. The son of a bitches probably won't pay the fucking bill. I hope they fucking go broke. That's it. |cough| Alright, we're gonna take this son of a bitch one more fucking time, and I mean this is the last fucking time we're gonna tape it. You mother fuckers ready? Alright, here we go. One fucking last fucking, mother hutchen time. The Icehouse is now open...|cough| NOW OPEN GOD DAMN IT!!