Thursday, June 29, 2017

Someone was taste testing the recipe?

I got an email from a very well known "Island Flair" chain restaurant about what they are offering in the "new drink" department for July 4th weekend. The food and beverages look yummy and there's opportunity to test drive the stuff at home (aka make it yourself), except there's one little problem.

The refreshing tropical liquid they're sporting right now, must not have been proofed before the email blast was sent. As in, someone was definitely taste testing while they were typing out the recipe.

Case in point:

The "One Love" adult beverage. The recipe and picture look amazingly good and I'd be tempted to try it during a party. I'm just having a little trouble figuring out the size ration and materials needed (bowls, etc).

I'm sure you can guess the restaurant brand!

Breaking everything down, I guess there's no prep time, but the cook time takes all of 2 minutes. I don't know what the serving size is supposed to mean. "12" what? Ounces? Liters? People? Judging by the amount of liquid being used in this drink, there's enough for a full party. I mean, an entire 750 ml bottle of Malibu Rum? 12 oz Appleton Estate Reserve? Yeah, this is going to give you a hangover for sure, if you drink it yourself. Be careful on what you're doing later - no heavy lifting or driving (a car, work machinery, etc). You're gonna feel like doodoo tomorrow morning. Slow and steady wins the race with this one; don't rush through this because it has orange juice in it. If drinking in the hot and humid part of the world... seriously take your time. Alternate with water. Have a nosh or two.

Meanwhile, the list goes on for other simple ingredients (non 21 and up worthy - a lime, a liter of guava nectar, a quart of orange juice) and finally there is the whole "procedure" to put it all together. Like you're going in for surgery... although, you may need some extra strength headache reducers or lots of H2O if you plan on going at this alone. Make sure your friends know what you're doing. Or just invite them over to partake in the servings. It says "12" for a reason. I'm sure you can find 11 people to hang out with. Get some party favors and have some fun.

The way to prepare this drink is by pouring all the liquids into a picture or serving bowl. Then you stir. Wait a minute; rewind that back... I don't know what a "picture" is, in relation to cooking. A picture is like the screen cap I put into this blog post or when I say "photo proof or it doesn't count". I think the author meant "pitcher", but I could be wrong? I know serving bowls - they're made for punches and finger snacks. It's this "picture" I'm not sure about. Is it new (culinary) English? Can someone explain this to me?

And why if you're adding all the liquid together in a big bowl (to stir together), aren't you adding ice to it? Is it supposed to be served at room temperature, only adding a flash of cold in the highball glass? All the punches I've seen people make, there's usually some sort of cold item in the bowl with the liquid. Can you freeze orange juice or guava nectar? Maybe you can add those as ice cubes to the bowl, as you are adding the liquid in anyway? I haven't made any punches in a while... is this possible? I know some people add a thing of sherbet when they make certain fruit punches because the sherbet is what keeps the drink cold. Once you scoop the punch in your glass, it is usually over ice.

Why are you saving room in the highball glass at the end for the Appleton Reserve? Let me rephrase that. The recipe says when serving, "fill a highball glass with ice and fill the with the batch leaving just a touch of room at the top. Float one ounce of Appleton Estate Reserve. Serve, sip, yum". So we are back to calling this something scientific and medical - "batch". What's a "touch of room at the top"? We talking 1 or 2 fingers worth - let's call shots! If you're supposed to "float one ounce" on the top, is that really "a touch of room"? I'm no bartender, so that's why I ask. "Serve, sip, yum"... someone come make this, serve me, I'll sip it, and tell you how yum it looks. Otherwise, I think I'll leave it to the professionals and just go in and order this (the website states it's $8.49 - It costs more to buy all the materials, but if you're making it for friends, then it comes out to be relatively cheaper).

Until next time... for those in the States, enjoy the upcoming holiday weekend!


See Also (aka what I am currently listening to as I type this):

See Also (aka extra links):

* In no way did I get any sponsorship or payment from this blog post, in regards to my "questionable review" of the drink. I only wrote this because I'm always looking at how many email blasts go out to people on a daily basis (from businesses), and it amazes me how many times external links have grammar or spelling issues. I know I am not immune to these faults, and I do try to read what I write in order to correct anything, but it's awkward and embarrassing for companies to produce things like recipes and have errors.

I only "get paid" if someone clicks my Amazon Affiliate link and purchases that item.