Grocery baggers unite?

I love to hate to love technology. I do not own a digital camera, yet, the closest thing to taking photos Now! and uploading it Then! is my camera phone. Considering I have a Motorola W755, that means I do not have access to 4square, Twitter, or anything else internet accessible. Therefore, whatever pictures I take, if any, need to wait until I can get transfer everything.

So... without much further ado, I have gone shopping today. I was grocery shopping and tchotchke shopping. The first picture was taken in the grocery store, where the baggers need a reminder on how to give proper customer service:

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What cracks me up is the fact it says "Use both hands to service customers faster!" Now, what the hell? That's a bit on the weird side, thanks. Unless you want to give me something else (a handshake? A High five?) as you bag my potatoes, just put my veg in the basket.

The next picture is from tchotchke shopping. They had cheapo depot knock off cologne. So after seeing the service sign, I was feeling up to checking out the social scene:

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I guess I what I need the next time I go out: Sex Appeal by Jovan - "Sex Appeal. Now you don't have to be born with it. ... This provocative stimulating blend of rare spices and herbs was created by man for the sole purpose of attracting women. At will. Man can never have enough.". 

First off - if it's rare spices and herbs, why are you using it to create a man's cologne?! 

Secondly, yea, it figures - man created it, so he can use the rarities. 

Thirdly, if the sole purpose of a man (and his smell) is to attract a woman, then we're all a bit messed up.

Lastly, "man can never have enough"??? Seriously?? In what decade are we in, for this advertising campaign? 

Cheers;